I’m working on a new post about something super dirty, but until then let me give you an account of why I’m so superduper tired… and why I keep telling my coworkers that I’m about to motorboat* my computer keyboard because I can’t keep my eyes open.

Wednesday night –
7:30pm-9:00pm – rake and spread dirt all over the yard. (yes, yes, I must confess this is what my upcoming “dirty post” will be all about)

9:15pm – make a deal with Husband (who did about 200% more work in the yard than me) that I will go to TacoSmellHole for him if he tucks in Brynn.

9:45pm – make a deal with Brynn to make her stay in her bed and close her eyes. Her usual bedtime is around 8pm so I am already fearing our cranky morning.

10:00pm – fold 2 loads of laundry and watch 2 episodes of Billy the Exterminator. I can’t help it. I love him. I have so many questions.

Thursday morning—
Around 1:30am – Brynn wakes up crying hysterically and appears magically at my bedside. Her juice cup is no longer on her nightstand ( I put it in the fridge). We get her juice and I bring her back to her bed. I crawl in with her and fall asleep instantly.

2:15am – I wake up in Brynn’s bed to hear Brando in his room jibberjabbering. I go lay on the couch and wait for him to really start crying, in the hopes that he’ll fall back asleep. I instantly fall asleep.

2:30am – Time to get up with Brando. He is chipper, I am not. He slups n’ burps. I change his stupid Huggies diaper and put him back to bed. He thinks this is funny. Me—not so much.

4:45am – The cat finds me and starts to lick me. I throw him off of me.

4:45:30am – The cat finds me and starts to lick me. I throw him off of me.

4:46am-The cat finds me and starts to paw at me. I throw him off of me.

4:46:30am – The cat finds me and starts to paw at me. I pick him and bring him to the basement and shut the door.

6:10am – I wake up and realize I don’t want to wake up and I don’t hear any children crying.

6:30am – I wake up and hear Brando babbling. Time to get up.

*The whole concept of visualizing somebody "motorboating" completely cracks me up. Just typing about it makes me laugh. Motorboat, Motorboat, Motorboat! Yeah! So, while I don't condone actual "motorboating," thinking about it is perfectly supercool. BAM. Larson OUT>redbull has kicked in.