Out of Hibernation

On the coldest day ever experienced... I'm venturing out! I attempted for a very brief period of time to have a blog on a different site. I quickly remembered that I hate learning new things on my own, so that did not result in any blog posts.

I meant to get back to blogger. But, I didn't.

And then life gave me a whole shitty pile of lemons, so I definitely wasn't coming back here.

The lemons are now lemonade and I want to be back. I am 7 years behind on scrapbooking and I need a way to document our crazy life. I mean, who doesn't want to see stuff like this:




Brynn in a pool of mashed potatoes.

 

Yep, and that's Brandon in the potato pool too.



 

 

I'll be back soon with my 2014 goals and to-do list. (And no more pictures of kids in mashed potato pools)

(Part II)

At exactly 11:37pm your dad and I heard a loud thud.  Immediately we both knew what had happened. You fell out of bed AGAIN. Just so you know, you fall out of bed occasionally and I find you when I come and check on you before I go to bed. You don’t normally thud like you did tonight, and you always sleep right through it – I find you on the ground with your butt in the air, sleeping soundly on your floor. I scoop you up and put you back in bed.

Well, this night was different.  The thud happened, you screamed, and then started crying hysterically.  I told you I’d be right in to check on you (Truth be told Brynn, I was “indisposed” in the bathroom when you fell and couldn’t come rushing in there.)  I soon came in to see you, and you were already back in your bed.  You looked half-asleep but were whimpering.  I looked at you and said a swear word really really loud.  You freaked out, completely woke up, and your dad came rushing in.

Sweet angel girl, you split your chin open for the fourth time in your six years of life. I don’t know how you manage to do this, but you do. (you’ve also required two separate trips to the er to have your lips stitched up.)  You had blood running all down your chin and onto your neck.

We examined your cut and contemplated whether or not we should take you in, wait til morning, or just leave it alone.  Leaving it alone was quickly ruled out and within about 20 seconds of getting all the blood cleaned off it was determined that I absolutely needed to take you to the ER.

You had to find something fashionable to wear.  I’m serious.  You argued with me about what you were going to wear, as the tears continued to stream down your face. (I got you in a purple sparkly tank top, purple leggings, a gray hoodie, and flip-flops). 

You were nervous that you were going to run out of blood and die.  We promised you that you wouldn’t.

Dad stayed home with Brandon and you and I went on my next adventure of the day.

Much like visiting the doctor earlier in the day, I had grand delusions of getting in and out of the ER quickly…. We walked into the waiting room and it was PACKED. I tried to tell myself that these people were all just waiting for family members. Uh-huh.  It was now just after midnight.

We sat down and started coloring. A little boy, also with a band-aid on his chin, came over and colored with us.  I moved an empty wheelchair with a mysterious puddle underneath it out of the way so the boy’s mother could also sit with us.  After a few minutes of coloring, I had enough courage to ask her the dreaded question. “So, how long have you been waiting?”

“Just over two hours,” was her response.

“Oh.” was all I could muster. I suddenly felt really, really tired.

About an hour into our wait, the little boy was finally called back to be treated.  You and I continued to watch really bad tv, go on a little walk, cuddle, play rock-paper-scissors, look at pictures on my phone, people watch, stare at the walls.  It was when you started making faces at a Bosnian looking man and loudly announce “There sure are a lot of Chinese people here” that I contemplated taking you home and starting over again tomorrow.  But… your chin was oozing blood through the band-aid and we had to go ask for a new one.  You again thought you were going to die, and I knew we better just stay.  I had to buck-up and get through this with you.

So we bucked up, and as we passed our two-hour mark, and the “Chinese” man was called back, you were also called back. The nurse removed your second band-aid of the night and just said “Oh. Um, the doctor will be right in.”

She noticed my raised eye-brow and clarified. “I don’t know if we can glue this.”  From past experiences with you, I knew that stitches meant waiting at least another hour for the numbing medicine to kick in. I just smiled and said. “Okay” but inside all I could think of was “Oh holy gawd. I’m not going to get to bed until at least 4am.”

The doctor quickly came in, looked at you laying there, and said “Yep, stitches. I can’t glue this.”  He shared that he was able to glue the little boy’s chin, but yours was a doozy.

So, for the next hour, you laid there, we watched tv, we talked, I took pictures of your chin to show you what it looked like, I called your dad and woke him up so he knew what was going on, we went through about 5 tissues to remove the oozing combination of blood and numbing gel seeping from your chin. Again, more awesomeness.

In all of the waiting and oozing blood, you got hungry. Really, really hungry.  It was now about 2:50am and you wanted a Whopper from Burger King. You also started talking about a party that was happening at daycare the following morning.  You were adamant that you didn’t want to miss it – oh and you wanted a Whopper.

Just after 3am, the nurse and doctor reemerged and put cloths all over your face.  You laid there bravely and timidly answered their questions.  To make you feel less nervous, I told the doctor that you were craving a Whopper.

Both the Dr and nurse thought that was pretty funny.  They told you that Burger King wasn’t open this late at night, but McDonalds sure was.  You quickly changed your mind and decided that McDonalds would be a perfect stop after all this nonsense was over.

The doctor gave you three stitches in your little chin.  The nurse said that she’d be right back with our discharge papers.

You got off the bed and started walking around the room.  You started to play with the room divider curtain.  As you were playing with it, you honest to God, hit your head on the bed rail. You started to cry. I was exasperated and told you to sit in one place until we could leave.

Where were those discharge papers??

After about 10 minutes of waiting, I opened our exam room door.  It was like the place had cleared out. Where the hell was everybody?

A couple minutes later, I approached a nurse. Turns out the doctor had put the discharge papers in the wrong box and had I not spoken up, we might still be there. I shuddered at the thought.

It was now after 3:30am, but we couldn’t leave yet! No! Not yet! We had to go stand in the discharge line and make sure the hospital had all of our insurance information!  Thank goodness this line went quickly and we were on our way. I would hate to have the hospital not be able to bill us for this.

So, to try and wrap this saga up – we went to McDonalds at  3:40am.  You wanted to go inside and play. Honest.  I ordered you “A chocolate shake and chicken nuggets.”  “Sorry, our ice cream machine is cleaning right now.”  I said “Fine. Chocolate milk and chicken nuggets.”  We pulled up to the window and I felt compelled to let the worker know why I had a 6 year-old out eating chicken nuggets at 4am.  He just smiled like he didn’t really care and we went on our way.

We got home, dad was sound asleep, but Brandon woke up. You ate the nuggets and I got Brandon some juice.  He thought it was morning time and wanted to get up and play.

By 4:15am, Brandon was settled again, and you and I were positioning ourselves on opposite ends of the couch – with a coffee table next to you so you wouldn’t fall off of the couch. You very innocently asked me "Are you going to read me a bedtime story?" I, not so innocently replied, "No. It's the middle of the night. I've already tucked you in once."

At 6am, Brandon was standing in front of both of us announcing “THE SUN IS AWAKE! WAKE UP MOM! GET UP!”

I brought Brandon into my bedroom and made your dad get up with him.  I fell back asleep until 7:05am at which point I woke up to hear Brandon crashing his firetruck into his bedroom walls.  Your dad was in the shower and no longer supervising. I got Brandon ready and called daycare to find out when  your party was.  The party was at 10am! Crap! That didn’t give you a lot of time to sleep!

I played/cuddled/tried not to pass out with Brandon until about 7:30am when your dad took him to daycare.  I went back to bed.  I woke up at 9am, and wished I didn’t feel obligated to go to work and get you to this party at daycare.  I started to get myself ready.  I jostled you at 9:20am and said “if you want to go to the party, you have to get up now. Keep sleeping though if you are tired.”

I’ve never, ever seen you get up so quickly in your entire life.

I got you to daycare around 9:50am and you showed off your bandages and your hospital bracelet.  I let everybody know that whenever you wanted to come home, that you were allowed to call me.  You were so happy to see your friends, that I had grand plans of you making it alllllllllll day long.

I got a call at 11:30am that your chin hurt and you wanted to come home.  I went to get you, and you quickly asked if you could have Asha come over and play this afternoon.

Yep, you were a total faker, but that was okay.

We went and did a little shopping and dad came home to be with you at 2pm…. And I continued to drink Monster energy drinks to try and stay awake until bedtime.

The End.

So, BrynnieBear, I need you to know that I share this story of my day, our day, not to complain. I would live this day over and over again so long as it had the same result –meaning all it took was 3 stitches to get you better again.  I just feel sick whenever I think of anything happening to you, your brother, or any other little kid.  You and Brandon are my absolute world and I would do anything for you.  You make me so happy and so proud to be your mom (except when you can’t figure out how to cover yourself up in bed.)

I love you more than anything, and I sure hope you and your dad have fun when HE takes you back to the ER to have the stitches removed in 5 days!

Dear Future Brynn (Part One)

I wrote a similar story about a night I want Brandon to learn about when he gets older (Brandon's Story), and now I’d like to share a story about Brynn I want her to know about when she gets older, but what's different about Brynn's story is that the preamble to 'The Event' lays the groundwork for something I will forever sarcastically refer to as 'The Best Day Ever':

PART ONE:

Dear Brynnie,

June 25, 2012 started out like any other day.  You didn’t want to get out of bed, but I made you.  I got to work and realized that I had a dentist appointment, a yearly-exam at the gynecologist, AND a defective cell phone that needed replacing… oh and your brother was completely out of diapers, and your dad was going to be gone all night helping a friend move.  Simply put, I knew it was going to be just AWESOME.

Dentist Appointment:

The regular dental hygienist was out, so they had a substitute fill in. She was fine but she asked too many questions. “What are you doing this Summer?” “Up to anything?” “You have kids?” “What school do they go to?” “Do you drink soda?” “What kind?” “Did you have braces?” “Who did them?” “What lake to you go to?” “Where’s it at?” and on and on.  You don’t yet know this about me little girl, but Mommy doesn’t like to get too friendly with people.  Call it a "friend-quota" if you will, but I don’t need to make chit-chat with people I will never, ever see again. I prefer fill-in hygienists to clean my teeth in awkward silence, so the constant inquisition was unnerving.  It didn’t help matters when she incorrectly held the water tube and TWICE had me spit used dirty water all over myself.  I left with wet hair. Totally cool.

Verizon:

Last week my phone microphone completely died. Verizon couldn’t fix it, so they ordered me a new phone under warranty. This phone arrived and I brought it into Verizon after my dental appointment.  The line was insane and I got annoyed, but I stayed pleasant and minded my own business.  Perhaps because I looked so pleasant with my wet hair and shiny teeth, one of the employees stopped selling phones and came over. I told her I had my replacement phone and I just needed it activated, and I’d be happy to drop it off and come back in a couple hours.  She said that’s fine, but just know it will be a $9.99 activation fee to do that. WHAT THE WHAT?? Your mommy lost it.  “You mean I have to pay $10 for you to activate a replacement for a defective phone? Why would I pay for a broken phone?? WHY WHY WHY WHY??”  Who knows why, but another employee quickly told her she was wrong, there would be no charge.

“The Doctor”:

I actually really like my doctor and I did my damndest to show up 15 minutes early for my 1:30 appointment, just like the reminder letter told me to.  I had grand plans of being the first appointment after lunch and possibly getting in early and getting out quickly.  About 1:40pm I was called back to the exam room. At about 2:00pm the nurse came in and apologized for my wait and asked if I needed anything. I did actually need something… I had to go to the bathroom.  She escorted me across the hall in my gown that opens to the back to the nearest restroom. Again, more awesomeness.  It was about 2:15 when the doctor came in. The hospital is switching to a new computer program, yadda yadda. She was very apologetic, but since I like her, it was no biggie. Over the years, she has made it into my inner circle of providers/infrequent contacts that I will talk to (unlike the sub dental hygienist).  I finally left the doctor’s office at 3:FREAKING15 p.m. 

I went and got my new replacement cell phone and went back to work.

The Evening:

We had a nice little evening, but my sweet child, you rocked my Betty Crocker world when you announced “Mom, you are the best cook ever!!” after I made you pancakes and eggs for supper.  Really? This is the best ever?  I am definitely going to stop trying so hard. You went to play with your bff, and I went to put Brando in the tub since he had pancakes and eggs all over himself.  He had a stick from outside that he wanted to use in the tub “to go fishing” and who am I to crush dreams? You know that Daddy is the dream-crusher, not me, and since he was gone, it was a-okay to bring sticks in the bathtub.

Brandon didn’t want to get out of the tub, so I let him continue to fish. I went and put clothes in the dryer…and maybe ate some chips… and then went back and checked on the fisherman. My sweet fisherman had decided about 5 minutes ago that he needed bubbles. Lots and lots of bubbles. He was now sitting with two completely empty bottles of brand new shampoo floating in the tub.

I scooped him out of the tub after he issued his “Shorry Momma, I’m so shorry” statements to me and kept the bubbles in the tub for you…. Yeah, this might have been ‘gross’ but that was two entire bottles of shampoo!! I wasn’t going to let that go to waste!

You came home from the neighbor’s house, you bathed, and I tucked you both in. I loved being able to cuddle with both of you tonight.

AND THEN IT HAPPENED….. (to be continued in Part Two)

Last Half of Summer To-Do List

Summer is almost over. I've been carrying around Brynn's school supply list in my purse for 2-weeks now. Target keeps telling me that pencils and crayons are on sale.  Come August 26, what will I have to show for my Summer??

We've had some windows replaced in our house, including a really large bay window addition in our new master bedroom, so this is good. But what else?  I've kept the garden alive, including a vine borer attack on my zucchini that had me binging, googling, and racing to menards to kill the little bastards that were eating my plant.... but I need to do more.

To help me get that much needed sense of accomplishment, I have made my to-do list:

1)      Get Brynn’s new room painted. (Long story short, she swapped rooms with me. I painted my room and put in a bay window. She is still living in chaos with a country blue room.)

2)      Make a new vegetarian recipe for the family. (I'm getting tired of cooking them food I won't eat. I think they should get served food that THEY won't eat once in a while! lol. Maybe they'll like it.)

3)      Get either the kitchen or the bathroom painted. (with the new windows in the living room, kitchen, bathroom, and two bedrooms, it has me on a house redo kick.)

4)      Work out at least 20 times on the new elliptical machine. (work out = more than 20 minutes)

5)      Survive the trip to Kansas, and blog about it. (We are going on a trip to visit my dad and stepmom.... and we are driving.)

6)      Get Brynn’s 6 year and Brandon’s 3 year pictures taken. (I'm going to try and get them scheduled at the same time.)

7)      Resolve at least three cases (options include: AF, ML, BH, or RB) ( I have a number of cases that are just begging to have a fork put in them, yet they just keep hanging on. I want to get them done so I don't have to wake up in the middle of the night thinking about these people anymore!)

8)      Go out for a girl’s night. (who's in?)

9)      Have a date with my husband. (I'd like to go to a restaurant without the children. Movie optional).

10)   Finish watching Mad Men and Breaking Bad on Netflix. (I'm 1 season away from finishing Mad Men... and I might have 2 seasons left of Breaking Bad. )

And somehow they grew up...

 

I started frenetically cleaning last weekend - which is extremely odd for me.  After I was done scouring the countertops with Comet cleanser in the kitchen, and hauling out bags of trash (and toys and shoes and stained clothing) from each child's room, I decided that perhaps it was time for the crib to go too... and then Brynn chimed in that she thought it was time for her training wheels to go also.

 

I was a bit nervous to let the crib go. I kept telling myself to not push this issue - Yes, he is 2 1/2 years old, but we had so many failed attempts with Brynn that she was in the crib basically until her brother was born and he had to claim it for himself! Ack! But yet I kept telling the husband "Get the bed down from the attic! We're giving it a try!"

 

So he got the bed down from the attic, and then he took the training wheels off Brynn's bike.

I gave Brynn the Miranda Rights of Bike Riding: "You have the right to fall, in fact, you will fall. You do not have the right to cry about it or get frustrated. You have the right to learn how to do this, but you will not learn how to do this quickly. You can call any of your grandparents and cry to them abouy it, but I'm not going to put up with it, kay? Do you understand these rights as I have explained them to you?" 

She agreed and 1/2 a block later we were both ready for a break. We picked up a couple pointers from our next door neighbor (who was my fourth-grade teacher) and came back home.

I had her pose for a picture later that day, on her second attempt (and she has yet to cry about any of it!)

I thought this was better than a picture of me holding her bike up for her. A bit more natural.

 

And then it was Boomer's turn to grow up.  He went to bed like a champ and never got out once.  I woke up Sunday morning to hear him "MOOOOMMMM??? Come get me! I want to get out now!"  I've never been so happy to have such an innocent naive child.   We're now about 5 days into this new arrangement and he's been awesome. I'm now kicking myself for not doing this sooner!  And now every night he makes the request to "come cuddle me Mom" and I love it.







Bubble guns are awesome bedtime companions.





It was a lovely bittersweet weekend...



Nope... He's never going to be a doctor.

I've been keeping this one to myself for a couple weeks... but it needs to be documented.  I need him to remember what he did to me on February 28, 2012 at 7:38 p.m. CST.

Brandon is my sensitive, reckless, independent, 2 1/2 year old lovey-dovey boy.  He is not potty-trained but he shows sporadic interest, so I got him a Lightening McQueen potty seat to use when he does get interested. (It's the kind that sits on top of the toilet so the parent doesn't have to go cleaning the contents out of the little potty seats. I did that with my daughter and it was gross, man.)

On Tuesday February 28, he was interested.  He asked me to take him potty.  We got to the bathroom and got him all set up and pointed down. (I feel like an accomplished mother when I remember this.)  He sat for approximately 30 seconds before declaring "I'm all done now" even though he didn't do a darn thing.  I let him get down and then we washed his hands, etc. The unaccomplished mother that I am did not bring a diaper to change him in to. No worries, eh?

He was walking to the bathroom door when he stopped to play with the laundry chute and give a shout-out to nobody downstairs.

He then started to toot.

Loudly and persistently.

Enough that he decided to grab his butt and start running back to the toilet.

And then he pooped all over the floor from the laundry chute to the toilet.

(It's not over yet.)

So I quickly grabbed him and put him back on the toilet. "I pooped mommy!"  I told him it wasn't a big deal and not to worry about it -- but I couldn't start picking it up because the kid was already sitting on the toilet and I wasn't going to put loose runny poop into a garbage can.

"I pooped mommy" he said again -- as he started to gag. And then more gagging. The more he looked at the poop the more he gagged.

And that's when he started projectile vomiting.

All over himself. The toilet.  And the rug already covered in shit.

I grabbed the garbage can that housed his previous dirty diaper, and he started to puke on that too.

I yelled for my husband to come and help me.

I yelled again for my husband to come and help me.

He showed up a minute later with a hand towel and my daughter. I yelled at them to avoid the crap covering the floor and to take his damn hand towel back. That wasn't going to be helpful.  They were ordered to leave.

It was back to the poop and puke-filled kid and me.  Much like a crime scene cleaner that I read about in a book, I decided to take this one step at a time. I ordered myself to not look at all the poop and the puke.  I started with the kid -- and then when he was clean enough, he went into the bathtub so I could work on the poop on the floor, and then finally to the toilet.

My 5 year-old's response to all of this: "HEY NO FAIR! BRANDON GETS TO TAKE A BATH AND NOT ME??"

It was a night to hopefully someday forget and only remember when Brandon someday stumbles upon this entry in my blog.

A Day in the Life - February 15, 2012

 5:15am - I wake up on the couch. Apparently I fell asleep during Teen Mom 2 last night shortly after it was revealed that Kail did the nasty with Jo in her shower. Gross.  I get up and go to my bed and immediately turn on the mattress warmer.

5:54 am - Brandon starts jumping in his creeky crib and announces "I'm in my room!!" He says this every morning, but I still think it's funny.  Sometimes I egg him on and ask him "Hey, where are you Brandon?" just to hear him say it again.  this morning was not one of those mornings.

6:15am - I get up to get in the shower, but decide to get Brandon a drink in hopes that he'll shut his yapper for awhile and let the rest of the house get some more sleep.  He is strongly in favor of orange juice.  I tell him to stay put in his crib, I'll deliver it to him.  He verbally agrees.

6:16am - Brandon swings himself like a monkey out of his crib and meets me in the kitchen.  I give him his juice and tell him I have to go take a shower now.  He's cool with this plan and immediately states "I help you."  (yeah, I found this a bit creepy too.)

6:17am - With drink in hand, Brandon runs to the bathroom and turns the bathtub water on.  "Here Mom!" he instructs.  I turned the water off and led him to the living room tv and put Spongebob on.

6:45am - I'm done with my shower and found Brandon, luckily, right where I left him.  I begin to take pictures.... but as you can see, something was wrong.  I immediately deduce my batteries are about to die and start to charge them.  I begin the normal daily routine and start to make bag lunches for the husband (JP or Jeremy) and daughter (Brynn).  JP gets a frozen chicken teriyaki, yogurt parfait, cool ranch doritos, and mountain dew (neither of us take his health very seriously.)  Brynn gets a bowl of pepperoni and cubed ham, carrots with ranch, grape juice, and a tootsie roll.

 7:10am - Brynn starts yelling from her room, but I'm in the kitchen.  All I can make out is "..and you're really hurting my feelings!"  I finished what I was doing and went to check on her.

(I put the batteries back in my camera and snapped a picture of Brandon on the way to Brynn's room and the camera worked just fine... after I turned a light on.  Turns out batteries weren't the problem, just the fact that I bought a fancy camera and have refused to learn anything about how to properly use the settings, the flash, and all that good stuff)

I arrive in Brynn's room to find her thrashing about and crying on her bed.  I ask her what her problem is and she quickly juts her foot out for me to inspect.  She's apparently having problems with her frog socks and since she's 5 1/2 years old, she cannot figure out how to put her toes in. Mmmm-hmmm.

Jeremy is in charge of dropping Brandon off at daycare on his way to work, so the guys left around 7:30am.  Brandon needs to get to daycare by 7:45am in order to get breakfast,so that's usually a pretty good incentive to get everybody up and out the door on time each morning....most mornings.

Brynn finally was up and moderately awake and ate her (disgusting) whipped chocolate mousse-style yogurt for her breakfast. I think it looks a lot like cat food and have refused to ever try it.  Since she's not a breakfast person and we're usually short on time, I let her eat it because she likes it.

8:10 am- hop in the car with brynn for the ½ block (literally) drive to school. (And yes when it's warm outside we walk.)

 At approximately 8:13am I have manuevered through the drop-off line and made it to the front of the school.

8:15am – call the office and say I’m going to CVS because I feel sick. Really sick. Well, that's what I say. The truth is that my nose hurts and I feel all sinusy and gross.

8:30ish – finally make it in to work and start taking pictures. Kate (the office manager) hides. We talk about valentines day and jeremy’s cat drawing and if I got a gift.  (translation: I got my husband a one-of-a-kind drawing of a cat from www.iwanttodrawacatforyou.com and in turn, jeremy got me a brand new flash drive for my computer.  perhaps next year, we'll just buy our own presents and call it good.)

This is my normally cluttered office.

This is where I work with Tim, Kate, and Spencer.

And this is my dead plant that used to be a beautiful palm.  Lesson learned, palms don't last in ND, or in offices.

8:50am – turn on my computer and crack my redbull.

9:00am – kate brings me a police report from the fax machine that I’ve been waiting for, I review it and bring it in to Tim (the Boss) who’s meeting with the client that it pertains to.

9:06am – get an IM from chantel about the Disney vaca she wants to take. Tim wants me to go meet with his client… oh the choices. I choose to follow the directives of my boss.

9:35am – done meeting with tim and his client.

9:46am – still dinking around on the internet. Somewhat happy that Kobe and Vanessa are possibly reconciling and that Blake Lively got a restraining order against an obsessed fan.

9:53am – new client arrives for a meeting. I’m bummed. I’m not in the mood for working. I wait for my airborne to dissolve before I head into the conference.

10:28 am - finish meeting with potential client. Needs to get her tax money back before she can retain me. Typical. I totally lowballed her just to get some business, should be an easy case if she comes back though.

10:42am – still not working.

11:05am – got done writing a letter to the potential client that just came in confirming the poverty lines and that she’d have to pay the whole filing fee with no waiver and to come back when she has the money. Tim came in and asked me to find him some spousal maintenance argument for his hearing this afternoon. I’m starving and can only think about nachos.

This is my half-assed argument - just the part in blue.

11:34am – stop searching for spousal maintenance arguments. Come up with a half-assed argument and write it down. Am completely starving now… and hope that I put brynn’s lunchbox in her bag. I’m about 99% positive that I have.

11:38am – Tim arrives to get his spousal maintenance argument.  Either he's really excited about what I came up with, or this picture was completely staged.

11:45am – invited myself to go to lunch with tim and spencer (his son that does all of our filing and box lifting) but then declined at 11:46 when I felt more of an obligation to get supper in the crockpot. Sad trombone.

(Here's the building buffalo. He never says much,  but he's a great listener. We've enjoyed many a long talks.)

I arrived at home about 4 minutes later....







11:50-1:00pm at home making supper and tidying up.

Here's my house. Brynn and Jeremy made the snowman.

Here's the view from my front steps.



Reason #1,328 why I hate the cat. Puke on the floor moron.

Beef Stew for supper

It was snowing when I came back to work!

Supper is Cookin'

1:06pm – return to my desk with my lean cuisine wood fire style margherita pizza. I had to come back to work so I could eat my lunch.

1:11pm – realizes I should really do something today that I can bill out for. So far I’ve earned NO MONEY today. Barfy. This is exactly what I love/hate about my job as an attorney and why I can basically make my own hours.  Today is a slooooow day and I need those once in awhile because some days are non-stop and you feel like you might end up losing your mind, and some days aren't crazy at all, but you have so much busy-work to do, you could easily end up working all night. So, it's okay that today is slow, but dear lord, let me get paid for something!!

1:16pm – IM with chantel. (I don't think she'll pay me if i bill her for this.)

1:18PM – IM with patty. (nope, she won't pay me either.)

Self-Portrait #1

1:32pm – just about ready to start working. I can feel the motivation starting.

2:17pm – YES!! I worked! I finish modifying a stipulation for parenting time, but the auto-numbering is killing me. I decide to "let" kate try and fix the damn margins because I can’t get it. Go try to take a self-portrait. Oooh – perhaps spencer can?

Self-Portrait #2

This one was Spencer's Idea...

Self-Portrait! (With Spencer)

2:27pm – done with the self-portrait and Tim's glamour shots. Tim is back from Court and won his spousal maintenance argument. Off to organize a request for production of documents with kate. 

Glamour Shot #1

Glamour Shot #2

The pile of documents that were requested.

2:47pm – Document requests had to wait.  After meeting with Tim about his hearing tomorrow, I was tasked with calling a  guardian ad litem to determine a location for a parental capacity exam that she recommended.

2:59pm – talked to a client about the hearing tomorrow and then went back to help Kate with the document requests.

Kate had to explain the hundreds of copies that Spencer had to make.

3:25pm – done organizing RPD’s with kate. Back at my desk trying to decide either what to do next, or what to avoid next…

While laughing at Kate and Spencer, I took the opportunity to photograph my favorite jean trousers.  Are they jeans? Are they slacks? I don't know, but I declare them work appropriate.

Hijacked Photo #1

3:35pm – my camera was hijacked and tim has started taking pictures of random shit and then decides to crush my soda can (like he does every day)…. I’m trying to do my time slip for today so I can determine if I’ve even broken even today.

Hijacked Photo #2. I was being instructed to "work it"

Hijacked Photo #3, of Melvin the Janitor

3:37pm –ordered my boss to go get me some gardettos after he gave me back my camera

3:39pm – my gardettos arrive at my feet after being flung from the front door.

3:45pm – still eating gardettos

The gardettos delivery service.

Hijacked Photo #4, of the crushed can.

3:47pm – tim asks me to look at the witness list from the other atty for his hearing tomorrow… still nothing but unbillable hours but for the stipulation revision.

4:00pm – basically given up on work for the day and decide to update my monthy expenditure spreadsheet with my paycheck information (I have started tracking everything that goes out/in to keep me from overspending)….Then I start reading an article about international abductions and aging out of the hague convention.

4:03 pm – client stops in unexpectedly. I try to hide, but am found and agree to meet with her. Yes, I will bill her for this.

4:18pm – back in my office to finish my cnn story about parental abductions.

4:33pm – just spent approximately 10 minutes on 'I want to draw a cat for you"'s fb page… and found a funny video of a guy skating in his basement. Posted it to my FB to share the laugh and to annoy my friends who don't understand my love for the cat man.

4:45pm - I get my notes from my 'day in the life' project printed out so I can keep working on them tonight.  I get ready to leave, go to the bathroom, etc. and come back to the office to find Tim digging through my purse. 

4:47pm - find Tim digging through my purse.

4:48pm - Tim realizes I'm writing this down and asks me to clarify that he was actually 'rummaging' rather than digging.

4:51pm - Off to get the kiddos.

5:00ish - I pull into the daycare parking lot and find Brynn outside playing.

I left her playing and walked through her classroom to go find Brandon in his classroom.

And here's my rascally wild man that I love so much.  He loves anything to do with cars, motorcycles, trains, airplanes - you get the picture.

I get the kids packed up and signed out, and Brynn took the opportunity to have a melt down in the car.  She got even more hysterical when I began documenting her meltdown.  (Reason for tantrum #2 of the day: she wanted to buckle herself up but couldn't get it quite right and I wasn't helping - but she never asked.)

5:19pm - we arrive at home.  Jeremy is already there.

The crockpot meal was done.  I gave Brandon a PB&J to go along with it because I knew there wasn't a chance he would actually eat the stew.  Brynn decided to have a sandwich with her stew and she ate it all.

(  I didn't eat anything because I'm a vegetarian and my kids have no idea that I don't eat meat. )

5:37pm - Brynn is done eating and Jeremy sits down to review my 'day in the life' notes and is absolutely horrified at what I do (or more appropriately what I didn't do) all day.  He also wants me to either clarify why I slept on the couch on Valentine's Day, or make up some other beginning to my day. (the reason I slept on the couch: we got home from supper with his family. He felt tired and sick and went to bed at 8:30pm and wouldn't let me have the tv on in our room. I went to the couch and fell asleep around 9:30pm. )

5:40pm - I tell Brynn to hurry up and get ready for dance tonight.

5:41pm - I tell Brynn to hurry up and get ready for dance tonight.

5:42pm - I ask Brynn if she has any idea of what she's supposed to be doing right now.  She has no idea.

5:44pm - I find Brynn completely naked in the bathroom wearing a fake mustache. 

6:02pm - Brynn is finally ready to go to dance class and has put on a completely atrocious outfit.  I don't really care as dance starts in 13 minutes and is a good 15 minutes away.



My Tiny Dancer



6:16pm -- Miraculously, dance has yet to start so I'm able to snap a picture of her as I leave her in Abby Lee Miller's care (just kiddin' - anyone else watch 'Dance Moms'?)

I got a bit paparazzi-ish and snapped a picture in the dance studio.

6:20pm - I'm back in my car, but not before I hold the door open for another mom and her baby. Wait, that's not a baby. It's her daughter's doll.  I'm completely embarassed and feel the need to say audibly to her "That's not a real kid!"  Nervous laughter ensues. I get in my car and head off to get myself some supper.  I used to sit at dance class and wait for Brynn and then go home and have a bowl of cereal, but for the past couple weeks, I've started to treat myself to a dinner by myself, wherever I want.  I sit and read a book and just enjoy the quiet.  Tonight I wanted Qdoba.

Two corn, Two Pico, Two Habenero

6:33pm - I sit down with my vegetarian gumbo and am very relieved that I left the horrible book in my purse that I was committed to never finishing because it's really really bad.  I read a couple more chapters and put it back in my purse, even more committed to never finishing.

6:40pm - The dance mom that I had the awkward conversation with moments before arrives at Qdoba with her husband, sans "baby."  I make an overly friendly smile at her.

7:10pm - I arrive back at the dance studio and get a call from my mom asking me if I'm at the dance studio. Mmm-hmm. She then proceeds to question me on scrapbooking techniques and how I would recommend to adhere pictures.  Really great conversation.

7:15pm - class is over and I decide to snap a couple more pictures.

7:30pm - We arrive back at home and Brynn beckons her brother so that they can open the present from Grandpa Tim and Grandma Pam that came in the mail today.



What seemed like an hour later, but was only minutes, the box was finally opened! Grandma and Grandpa sent a present from their Florida vacation - tshirts, sunglasses, and a SEASHELL THAT YOU CAN HEAR THE OCEAN IN!! Brynn has been wanting one for a loooooong time!!! 

Really?? My own seashell??

 

The seashells were a hit!

Brandon wasn't a big fan of the sunglasses and opted to put his hood back on whenever I tried to put them on his face.

My camera-friendly diva had no problems posing for me.

7:45pm - Time to start rallying the troops and heading for bed.  It was Jeremy's night to tuck in Brandon and my night to tuck in Brynn - but since I felt like I was only able to see him for about 10 minutes today, I let Brynn stay up a bit longer and I went and read Brandon 1 of his bedtime stories.

As you can tell, he was really excited.

7:55pm - and then I was off to get Brynn in bed- after I turned on my mattress warmer.  She is just learning how to read and it's awesome to hear her do such a good job!  Tonight she was blowing through a Biscuit book.

(it's good the cat is so good to the kids and vice versa -- tonight the cat got to listen in on Biscuit and his aversion to baths)

8:15pm - I have Brynn all tucked in and I head to the kitchen to get the beef stew packed up for Jeremy's lunches over the next couple days and make sure Brynn's ice packs are in the freezer for her bag lunch tomorrow.  I go through her backpack to make sure I'm not missing any notes.

I check the meal planning board to see if I need to get anything prepped for supper tomorrow and find that I need to take some hamburger out of the freezer.

8:45pm - I get to my room, happy that I had turned on the mattress warmer earlier. I play a round of mario kart on Brynn's nintendo ds and wait for Revenge to start at 9:00pm

9:00pm -- Oh I am so happy!!

9:30pm - I get a text message on my phone from Tim, my boss. My phone is wacked and I can't read my text messages and have yet to get it fixed.  I have to get up from my bed and go downstairs to get jeremy's cell phone.

9:35pm - I text Tim back with Jeremy's phone and tell him if he really needs something to text me at this number instead. (anybody watch 'Two Weeks Notice' with Sandra Bullock and Hugh Grant? -- well working with Tim is much like that movie. I never know if the random text is because something urgent has happened, or because he doesn't know if he ate chicken or turkey for lunch -and that IS a true example of a text I once recieved.)

9:36pm - Tim texts back.

9:36-10:07pm - Texts between Tim and I regarding his hearing that starts at 9:00am tomorrow in Ada.  I need to get to the office first thing in the morning and attempt to subpoena somebody to show up at the hearing. That should be a lovely experience.

10:00pm - start to watch 'Untold Stories of the ER' on TLC.  The first story is about a man who was stoned and drunk and decided to put his 'you know what' in a camper stove that was missing a knob.  He arrived at the er with two blankets clothespinned at his shoulders and holding a camper stove.  I fell asleep before I found out if the stove was removed or if the doctors had to amputate.

And THAT was my February 15, 2012.